it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
Randomize
