How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
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