what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
Randomize
