It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
Randomize
