I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
He passed out mid-signature
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
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