girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
Randomize
