If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
Met the five year old's gym teacher for next year. He is an old drinking buddy and I used to fuck his older brother. It was like a walk of shame 20 years late.
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Randomize
