Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
My vagina just recognized that song.
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
