1:57 a.m. Where did you go???
1:58 a.m. What are you doing? I want to go home with you, why aren't you responding?
2:11 a.m. Heading back to your place now, will you let me in?
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
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