The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
Randomize