The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
Randomize
