hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
My pants zipper is stuck halfway down. I have to interview an intern later. This day is gonna be amazing,
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
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