i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
Randomize
