I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
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