if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Randomize
