I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
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