never play flip cup with pint glasses
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
Randomize
