I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
Randomize
