My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
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