we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
He had one of those small greek statue penises
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize
