just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
Randomize
