do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Randomize
