You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
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