He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
I might get fired at work today. I had to prioritize. It's not my fault Cockasaurus came over.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
foreskin is a definite game changer
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
You know you're stoned when you tell your dog you're stoned only to realise he's not in the pickup
Randomize
