No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Randomize