when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
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