i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
I can feel your judgement through the phone
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
Randomize