How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
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