i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
Randomize
