Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Randomize
