So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
