I wish I could punch you in the face.
that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
he puts the penis in happiness.
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
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