they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
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