So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
operation have a gay friend backfired
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
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