She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
It was my birthday today and i decided that i am not checking my notifications on facebook so ill feel popular
Wrong number and your a loser
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
Driving to get a preg test with my ex, wearing my unicorn hat
You are so not ready for motherhood
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
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