You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
Randomize
