do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
Randomize
