Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
Randomize
