She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
Randomize
