worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
Randomize
