drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
Floor bacon is actually really good
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
The guy in the room next to me just offered to hide the next dose of morphine he will get for his broken leg under his tongue and then swap it with me in exchange for a roll of the good toilet paper my parent brought for me last they visited. The psych ward is a lot more hardcore than I thought.
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
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