just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
cannot fit in my clothes. too depressed to drink.
if you drink enough to puke, it's like a weight loss plan.
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
Randomize
