Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
My underwear smells like fireworks.
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
Randomize