proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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