its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
Randomize