Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
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