oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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