I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
Randomize
