You know you have a problem when you walk into your bathroom find kettle one in your shower and a note you wrote yourself when drunk that says "panties at jared leto's" on your counter
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
