"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
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